I could make another category on this page here, and call it "True Stories from the Google-Plex" or something, but then I might as well get rid of all the other categories, because I have nothing else to talk about.

So today I was upgrading a bunch of computers and one database server kicked the bucket. This is nothing unusual; it might conceivably have been fixable, but we don't really bother unless there's a reason to think that it will be faster to fix than to rebuild from a backup copy.

Naturally we have a tool for doing this reconstruction, but it is a dangerous one, since its purpose is to tear down databases in any random screwed-up state and replace them with new, clean databases. This means that if you happen to aim it at the wrong machine, such as by making a typo, the consequences could be very, very bad. Here is an approximation of what it said to me:

[6 Mar 06 15:47:18] Checking availability of someserver.google.com
[6 Mar 06 15:47:18] Server already contains a database
[6 Mar 06 15:47:18] You are asking to destroy data.  Please stop and
think about what you are doing for a minute and read the following
message from the server:
[6 Mar 06 15:47:19] -------------

Welcome to <important database> on <someserver.google.com>.  
My files are precious.  They were installed by <your especially 
cranky coworker> at <a while ago>.  Please be careful.

[6 Mar 06 15:47:23] -------------
[6 Mar 06 15:47:23] To continue, type "I will be fired if I screw up."
> 

I have made up all of the messages except the last one, which is verbatim. And yes, you have to type "I will be fired if I screw up," with correct capitalization and punctuation. It is a perfect example of what Al Franken called "kidding on the square" in his book, because it's funny, but it's not.

Because we're kidding, of course.

Sort of.

07 Mar 2006 00:08 PT - persistent link - trackback - 3 comments